A sobering thought before bedtime

the last couple of days have been nice. I got really hungry and angry on Monday. I didn’t eat lunch and it took a few hours after dinner for my low-blood sugar to get better…stupid insulin.

We celebrated Susie Becker’s graduation from graduate school by making her a huge card and then leading a fashionably late processional singing “Pomp and Circumstance” on our way into PA inservice. Pomp and Circumstance is the name of the graduation song that plays at all graduations. I felt pumped about how much we cared about Susie. Even though beforehand I got really fussy. It happens. I blame it on the lack of food earlier in the day…though, that might not be the best thing to say…I might just have to own my poor choices.

They talked at inservice about “saying goodbye” to the people who live on our floors. I confess that I haven’t really got that far in my head. I want to be able to experience the moments that I have left…the result however, will most likely be me crying as I check those kids out of their rooms. They’re really awesome. I’m going to miss them…but not so much the telling them to be quiet.

Also, I’m going to have to be a hardass when I check people out. So if you’re one of my residents reading this…get your ducks in a row. There will be no late check outs.

I might work at camp this summer. I was trying to avoid it because I wanted to spend time with my family and study for a test I have to take in order to be certified as a medical interpreter…but then the people at camp (rather the director) made it clear that he’d be flexible enough with me to allow me to do both of these things. My parents said that it’s basically my call. Now I have a week to figure out if it’s what God wants me to do. I’m just so tired of being a leadership type person…but maybe being waterfront director at camp is just what I need…who knows.

My friend Joel and I hung out today. I like Joel alot. He’s going to be the next ASSP President. He’ll do well. We were roomates once for a year. Those were good times. I miss hearing his obnoxious country music when I get back from anywhere…I like Rascal Flatts now. It’s Joel’s fault. I’m serious.

Here’s the sobering thought and then it’s bedtime. I visited my friend Kelsie Job in the hospital today. She was in a car accident. A guy hit her going incredibly fast in a Porsche while she was driving back to school. The guy in the Porsche died. She got a severly broken leg, she’s extremely lucky. Before I got into the hospital I was whining to Joel about how challenging some things were in my life and whatnot. Then I visited Kelsie. It put things in perspective. She’s going to be in the hospital until the beginning of next week. I want to go see her in the hospital again on Saturday for longer and maybe bring something fun to read aloud…okay, maybe that’s not the best idea. She’s in the hospital…she’s not five.

Let’s face it. Her problems are real. She may not walk for awhile (understatement). And I complain about anything I am able to. I complain when I’m tired. I complain when I am hungry. She was sitting in the hospital bed and never said a word that sounded like a complaint the whole time I was there. It puts life in perspective. What really matters if life is so fragile? If you were to die tomorrow (like the man in the porsche did) what would you do differently?

I think that for me I am reminded how important it is to visit those people you care about and tell them you care (especially those are stuck in hospitals. They’re really lonely places.) A friend of mine had lukemia for 2 years while I was in college. He was in Seattle all the time and in all those times I only spent 1 afternoon visiting him in the hospital before he died…I regret that. So much more than I can convey in words. I wish that the stupid freshman and sophomore versions of myself were here so I could scream at them and tell them to get their asses to a bus to visit one of the most beloved people in their lives…I wish I could change the past. However, I cannot. I am left with wonderful memories of a man who I will never see again in this life…but there could have been more of those had I been less selfish with my time. That may seem hard on myself, but you can’t deny it. Can you? Me either. Take time to tell people you love them, you never know when they’ll be gone.

I heard Dr.Keuss say this once and my trip to the hospital proved its truth. The places where the sick are, the places where the poor are, the places where the oppressed are…These are the places where God’s blessing dwells. We have to go there to be a part of the blessing. Not to say that the God blesses sickness, povert and oppression but more to say this: I think I might have been more blessed by visiting Kelsie in the hospital than she was by having me visit. The perspective I recieved is something that I hope I don’t forget. I hope you don’t either.